I can't take things slowly
Come let away, that's what they all do
Help me cause I'm feeling shaky
Tell me what's wrong with my brain
Cause I seem to have lost it.

Please, please come and save me
Tell me what's wrong with my brain.

Suicidal thoughts came back to my head.
What. The. Fuck.

Why can't i get over you when the others makes it so easy?
I really miss you alot babe.

I'm glad you're happy with the one you are with.
Even though i'm happy for you, it just hurts like something you will never understand.

Yeah, I still need you, what good that's gonna do?
Needing is one thing, but getting is another.

It looks easy, oh let's do it.
But when you're in it, it's hard as fuck.

I thought I was getting better.
It just keeps getting worse.

I just learnt to hide my emotions better.

And now we're just down to saying simple sentences just to feel the gaps.

I knew if I don't text you, you won't.
I'm actually bothering you, aren't I?

It's heart-wrecking.

Do you even know how I felt?
How I'm trying to get by every single day.
How I'm trying to ignore that Valentine's day is going to be a lonely day for me.
How I'm trying to ignore that the fact that there's no hope.
How I'm trying to force myself to stop texting you.

Do you know how much I try to stop myself from thinking about you?
How much I have to restrain myself?
How I have to throw away that valentine's day gift to you?
How I have to forget every single happy moments we shared?
Do you know how much I love you?

No you don't. You'll never do.
You don't understand, and you never will.

Well, valentine's over.
No use brooding over it.

I can't concentrate on my work.
Pressure on me.

It's good to see you being treated like a princess you deserved to be.
Which I can never do.
Ever again actually.

This is my idea, this is my plan.

If he's making you sad, i'll be the jerk to make you go back and confide in him.

At the end, you'll still be happier.
I want you to be happy.
I always wanted you to be happy.

5.32am

Can't sleep.
Usual reason.

You realised I am not texting you much,
nor talking to you on facebook.
Or even just talking to you.

Yes, I've got to the point where I got so heartbroken,
I don't even know what I'm doing anymore.

You have better things to do than to entertain someone like me.
Holding on for lost love.

So why don't you go get the best out of your life?
Just let me depreciate slowly.

I'll get used to it, becoming nothing but just.

The reason why I'm so angry is because,

I know I can treat you better.
I know I love you more.
But you still chose the other guy.

What is love?

Makes me laugh just thinking about how stupid I am to keep loving you, when you've already moved on and having a happier life that doesn't involve me.

Why can't I just push everything aside?
Sometimes I wish I weren't such a sucker for love.

I can do everything for you,
but when everything ended,
that sucker still do what he does.

I'm stupid for loving you.
And I still do.

Fuck.